Smell the flowers on your side of the path

This is a really wonderful story…………

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, while the other was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

Of course the perfect pot was proud of it’s accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of it’s own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what what it had been made to do. After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.

“I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to the house”. The old woman smiled, “Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path but not on the other pot’s side? That’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You’ve just got to take each person for what they are and look at the good in them.

SO to all my “crack pot” friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!!!!

Rocky Balboa has it Sussed!!!!

(before you think I’ve lost the plot,read on……….)


If you are in your 30’s-40’s (or even older) you most probably grew up with Rocky. Even if you had never watched any of his films most of us could identify the theme tune from the Rocky movies, and most of us laughed at the way he spoke (or mumbled).

When the first Rocky movie came out I was still a really young girl, and being a real “girlie girl” hating anything related to boxing, I remember watching the first film and being quite non-plussed by what I saw.

However, this week something changed all that.

My husband came home with the Rocky Anthology this week, and I suddenly lost the will to live. There was NO WAY I was going to sit through six Rocky films. However, my husband then said something that really sparked some curiosity in me. He said “it’s not about the boxing, it’s more than that”. So I grabbed my tub of Haagen Daaz Choc Chip (well I needed some incentive!) and settled down to watch them over a series of nights. Suddenly I saw everything with completely different eyes. My husband was right (again!).

As I watched the films I realised there was so much to learn from the stories. Firstly here we had a man from a less than privileged background, with very little formal education. However, he had something really potent; he had a vision and a dream. In each film he had a different goal/vision, and he worked, sweating blood and tears to achieve each goal he set himself. I watched as he was so nearly de-railed achieving each goal, and yet he just kept picking himself up (literally) and continuing. He didn’t let anything get in his way, even when his body was literally broken, he kept going. Now that’s vision!!! What really stood out for me the most was not only his determination and motivation but that he never lost his integrity. Despite constantly swimming amongst sharks and piranhas, he never became one. He achieved his goals by keeping his integrity and spiritual belief in tact.He always believed in his goals, but the love for his family always came first. That for me was what really resonated for me. How many people do we know who start off swimming with the sharks and then become one themselves. Their excuse is usually that they needed to change to survive. Rocky shows us that this is nonsense.

And what about his coach. For me the person who epitomised his coach wasn’t as you might expect his trainer, it was his wife. Yes, the famous Adrian! She was more (or as ) certain and focused on his goals than Rocky was himself at times. She always encouraged him to press on, learn from his set-backs and celebrated his victories with him. She encouraged him to be more, and to do more than he would sometimes ask of himself, and most importantly she was the first person in line waving the flag at the top of the mountain when he finally arrived there.

So take it from a “girlie-girl” albeit somewhat older, that this film is more than a film about boxing. If you are looking for some real down-to-earth, hardcore motivation/inspiration without too much spiritual woo-woo, then give these a try. Just watch them from a different perspective, and see if I’m right. I think there's a lot that can be learnt from these fine set of films.

Every Woman Should Have........

A woman should have
one old love she can imagine going back to, and one who reminds her how far she has come.

A woman should have
enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own

even if she never wants to or needs to.

A woman should have
something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to
see her in an hour……..

A woman should have
a youth she is content to leave behind.

A woman should have
a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to retelling it in her old age.

A woman should have
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

A woman should have
one friend who always makes her laugh and one who lets her cry.

A woman should have
a good piece of furniture not previoulsy owned by anyone else in her family.

A woman should have eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honoured.

A woman should have
a feeling of control over her destiny.

Every woman should know
how to fall in love without losing herself.

Every woman should know
how to quit a job,
break up with a lover,
and comfort a friend without ruining the friendship.

Every woman woman should know
when to try harder….and when to walk away.

Every woman should know
that she can’t change the length of her calves, the width of her hips or the nature of her parents.

Every woman should know
that her childhood may not have been perfect……but it’s over.

Every woman should know
what she would and wouldn’t do for love.

Every woman should know
how to live alone……even if she doesn’t like it.

Every woman should know
whom she can trust, whom she can’t,
and why she shouldn’t take it personally.

Every woman should know
where to go……..
be it to her best friends kitchen table…….
or a charming inn in the woods………..
when her soul needs soothing.

Every woman should know
What she can and can’t accomplish in a day…..
a month……and a year.



Maya Angelou

The Honey Bee Has it Sussed!!!!

A question coaching clients often ask me is, "how do I find my purpose in life?" They get really tangled up and stressed trying to find out what their purpose is; what should they be really doing with their lives.A great and easy way I find to explain how we fit into the grand scheme of things is by using this fab quote by Peter H.Thomas

"If you asked a honey bee what it's purpose in life is, it would say it is to make honey for the colony. However, we know that a bee's life contributes a whole lot more to our world than just busily making honey. By doing its daily work, the honey bee in fact goes around and pollinates all the flowers and plants which results in new life for our planet. So just like in our lives, we may not realize what our big purpose in life is, by doing what we're passionate about, and by doing it well, with focus and determination, we may just affect a whole bigger purpose in our lives."

This sums it up totally for me!

How do you decide your purpose?

The 3 Reasons People Come Into Your Life

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then without any wrong-doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring this relationship to an end. Sometimes the ending is created by death. Sometimes they just walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelieveable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Any thoughts?

Would anyone like a cookie?

A young lady was waiting for her flight in the boarding area of a large airport.
As she would need to wait for many hours, she decided to buy a book to spend her time. She also bought a packet of cookies.

She sat down in an armchair, in the VIP room of the airport, to rest and read in peace.

Beside her chair where the packet of cookies lay, a man sat down in the next seat, opened his magazine and started reading.

When she took out her first cookie, the man took one also. She felt irritated, but said nothing. She just thought “What a nerve! If I was in the mood I would punch him for daring!”

For each cookie she took, the man took one too.
This was really starting to infuriate her, but she didn’t want to cause a scene.

When only one cookie remained, she thought “Ah……what will this abusive man do now?” Then the man, taking the last cookie, divided it into half and gave her one of the halves.

Ah! That was too much to bear!
She was much too angry now.
In a huff she took her book, her things and stormed to the boarding area of the airport.

When she sat down in her seat inside the plane, she looked into her bag to take her glasses, and to her surprise (or dismay?) her packet of cookies were there, untouched and unopened!

She felt so ashamed! She realized the error of her ways. She had forgotten that her cookies were in her purse.

The man had divided his cookies with her without feeling angry or bitter

…….while she had been very angry thinking that she was dividing her cookies with him. And now there was no chance to explain herself……..nor to apologise.

Remember, there are 4 things you can never recover:

The stone
…after the throw

The word
….after it is said!

The occasion
….after the loss!

The time
…after it’s gone!

You Lucky Devil!

I would like to pose the question does luck play a part in business? If it does, is it possible to increase your luck?

How often have we heard entrepreneurs stand up and take complete credit for their success? Is it possible that there is always an element of chance in business, and therefore there is always an element of luck?It could be luck of timing, the luck of someone else’s mistake or a multitude of other so-called coincidences.

Or is luck nothing more than getting a return on all that intangible work you have put in? Perhaps luck is about ensuring that even the smallest stone does not go unturned.

Or perhaps luck is nothing more than a self-fulfilling prophecy? i.e. if you believe you are a lucky person or that you always get lucky breaks, it may well change your behaviour, your level of confidence and your psychology, which in turn may actually make you luckier. Therefore you seize opportunities that may once have appeared too risky. Whereas if you “ feel” unlucky you probably won’t seize the opportunities or pursue things.

I would like to believe it’s the latter; that believing in luck is a self-fulfilling prophecy and is about recognising opportunities when they arise. But it’s very possible I am wrong.

What’s your view on the part luck has played in your success?



Copyright © Vanessa Vinos/Vision Life Coaching-2007.